One-Night Stand

A conversation with someone you just met at a pub could turn intimate and there are chances that you might even get lucky if things turn a little romantic. And, if a recent study is to be believed, one-night stands are increasingly turning into meaningful relationships.

Many surveys have suggested that the quality of a relationship is better for individuals who wait for things to get serious before having sex, in comparison to the those who become sexually involved right at the start. However, this new study found that a woman who is involved with a friend is 44 % more likely to stay committed and as for the men, the likelihood increases by 25%. If the same people were to get involved with a stranger or acquaintance, the odds increase by 30% for women and 43% for men.

“To have a meaningful relationship out of a one-night stand is absolutely wishful thinking and many people are in denial,” says Sanjana, a graduate and regular party-goer, “A one-night stand can be dangerous as it increases the chances of contracting sexually transmitted diseases — not the best thing to happen, especially when one is merely looking for fun.”

The ‘friends with benefits’ concept has also been in existence for long, and although it is based on sexual gratification, which can be temporarily fulfiling, a mature mind stops one from being part of the game.

Rhea, a visual artist, who believes in being sexually experimental, says, “Having sex with random men gives one a liberated feel initially. But the down side of this behaviour is that after some time, it backfires and gives one a feeling of worthlessness. In some ways, it’s like abusing and disrespecting your body.” However, she was the one who met her mate in the most casual of circumstances. She met a Canadian national over a drink, they got talking, exchanged stories and are now in love. “It was such a beautiful feeling. We haven’t made love yet and I’m in no hurry as I’ve never felt this way before,” she says, “It may not be a one-night stand, but if the chemistry we share is good, there’s nothing stopping us from going ahead and getting into a relationship.” So, it appears that the study does have some relevance even in our country.
Psychologist Sudha says, “Couples who become sexually involved with friends or acquaintances and are open to serious relationships could end up just as happy as those who date and wait.”

However, Rhea might have been lucky, and although a random hook-up at a bar does have the potential to turn into a passionate relationship, some relationship experts say it’s not really the best idea. Clinical psychologist, Seema Hingorrani says, “Often, sexual intimacy leads the couple to believe that they can have a good relationship as well. But later, feelings of guilt creep in. In situations like this, it’s best to tread carefully as it affects the lives of several people.”

Recalling a real-life situation, Seema says, “There was this man who was married but had a one-night stand with a woman and then wanted to marry her. He left his wife and got into a live-in relationship with the new woman, only to find out later on in life that they had serious problems. He wanted to get back with his wife, but she refused to do so and instead divorced him.”